The Absurdities of Life and Culture, The Positivity of
Self- Obsessiveness, and The Eternal Pursuit for Satisfaction
People want to seek value and meaning in their lives. Most are unable to find any, in philosophy, this is the"Absurd." Albert Camus said, “I draw from the absurd three consequences, which are my revolt, my freedom, and my passion.”
In my work, I find myself reflecting on our culture, the positive side of self-obsessiveness, the absurdities of life, and the quest for satisfaction. I am obsessed with the stuff we all need to cope with the ordinary anxieties of being alive. I am a post medium artist exploring every aspect of art that my ideas require sculpture, video, photography, installation, and performance.
I was born into this world which is obsessed with labels and narcissism. My work may seem humorous, mildly inappropriate, almost teasing the ordinary viewer, especially the male gaze. However, I intend to draw the participant into a more in-depth experience and to challenge their perception of our culture. I want them to ask: Why do we place such importance on objects? On the female body? On the female body as objects? On ourselves? On ideas laid out and created by male artists? If a man can make a 10-foot sculpture representing his penis, so can I.
For most of my life, I found myself rebelling against the neediness of consumerism and being born into a male dominated society. Even though with time things have gotten better for women, I’ve found myself becoming an angry person, angry at what the world has become, and totally consumed by present day horrors of reality. I eventually began to cope with the corruption of modern-day existence, and I started to see the beauty in the absurdity of the materialistic world, a world based on selfishness, and a world ultimately controlled by men. This world has made me feel like an object, and instead of being distressed over this, I accept my fate and turn myself into an actual object, rubbing the truth in those whose eyes turn me into one . Currently I am turning myself into different objects, from pocket objects like lighters and matches, things that are used as one pleases to household items like mirrors and chairs.
Empathy has controlled my life. I have spent most of my life continually helping others before myself. Having that quality might be deemed as positive, but by learning through my work, I’ve started to believe in the positivity of selfishness. Without caring and helping yourself how are you supposed to help others? This idea of self-care and nursing my own PTSD and personal traumas motivates me and inspires me in my own work. When one loses full control of one’s body, what are you then? Most likely just an object, that one has used as they pleased. I spent a lot of my life angry, but in thatI was able to find ways to cope. I am giving myself the ability to take back control of self and in turn, being fully in control, whether one is dominating or submitting. This comes out in my work in the form of BDSM, my interpretation of a controlled and safe sexual environment, as well as full blown narcissism.
Self-care is my freedom. helping myself before I can help other people, putting on my own oxygen mask before helping those around me. The root of all my work is my expression of self, whether that being selfishness or selflessness I encourage viewers to find themselves by looking at art my art and changing my face to theirs. As an example, a piece I am currently showing, is a mirror that when looked into, you see both my face and your own simultaneously. My eyes being met with yours. We are the same because we are both experiencing human existence.
I am obsessed with people obsessed with things. Whether that be concepts and ideas, or physical objects, I am curious about what we buy and why we buy things, and how there is always something we can buy to make our lives easier. There is always a new item or technology just waiting for the masses to fixate on, but are we happier? Will we ever be truly satisfied?
Pop culture profoundly influences me. I indulge in the absurdity of icons and am a willing participant, consuming the meaningless gossip of those I do not know, and I find myself seeing them on the same level as myself, almost as a modern-day prophet, like a God. Having masses of people listen to you and wanting to preach the messages you are putting out into the world. I look in the mirror and see myself every day, I recognize myself instantly, which is the same way I feel when I see icons. They are constant figures in your life you know everything about, yet you actually don’t. There is a private side to everyone, iconic or not. The same way you might be projecting yourself to the outside world. In my work, I use myself as my own iconic representation of human existence, by incorporating imagery of myself into my work. I find myself intrigued by the idea of perception vs. reality.There is what we perceive and what is real. The perceived value of luxury. The perceived value of art. How much can I be monetized for? Is there a price for happiness? Monogram, Logos, Collecting. Obsessing. The comfort of “looking”comfortable.
No one is ever satisfied. You can always have more money, things, friends. Nothing will ever be enough. There is still more. And in that, I find that most of us are miserable. In this pain that most of us have felt, I find humor by almost decoding and making sense of a corrupt system. My passion is my work, and my work is my therapy. My work is the sense of self that reflects my ongoing challenge to put all of these things into perspective for the viewer. To you, I am just a chair, but to myself, I am the most famous person I know.